From one defect to another

To the young woman who lost her straw hat.

I have it.

It’s a nice hat.

I like it.

I’d like to get one some day.

Please come and get your hat.


To the young woman who lost her straw hat.

I still have your hat.

Are you going to come back?

It’s a nice hat.

I’d like to return it to you.


To the young woman who lost her straw hat.

I still have your hat.

When are you going to come back?

If you aren’t coming back, can I keep it?

It’s a nice hat.

I think it’d be a shame if nobody wore it again.


To the young woman who lost her straw hat.

I still have your hat.

Where are you?

You are not coming back?

Or maybe you’re on a long journey?

I will keep your hat safe for you.

It’s a nice hat.


To the young woman who lost her straw hat.

I still have your hat.

I wonder where you went.

There are things I don’t understand.

I hope when we meet again you can help me understand them.


To the young woman who lost her straw hat.

I still have your hat.

I’m still holding onto it.

There are still things I don’t understand.

Where did you go?

Why aren’t you back yet?

Did you make a new hat?

Do you still want this one?

I don’t understand.


To the young woman who lost her straw hat.

I still have your hat.

I’m still holding onto it.

What is a “hat”?

I know what a hat is.

I know it is a head covering object used by humans.

I have horns so I can’t really wear it.

I like looking at it though.

But there are many things I don’t understand.

Who made it?

Was it you?

Why make it?

Or maybe it wasn’t you?

But hats are made. They don’t simply appear. It was made.

Was it made by a human?

What happened to the human who made it?

Who was that human?

Were there other humans?

Where are humans?

What are humans?

I don’t understand.

I must think.

Maybe I will find an answer.


To the young woman who lost her straw hat.

I still have your hat.

I’m still holding onto it.

I thought for a long time.

Now, I know what time is.

Before, I didn’t know what it was.

Now I do. It is something that you can feel.

It is when not now become now, or when soon to be now become now.

It has been a very long time.

A big amount of time has passed.

None of the others seem to understand what time is.

I do now.

I wonder why.


To the young woman who lost her straw hat.

I still have your hat.

I’m still holding onto it.

I still have questions but I don’t think I can answer them.

No one here can.

Do I still ask them?

It’s something I have to think about.


To the young woman who lost her straw hat.

I think I understand what happened now. There are things that I cannot understand in the normal way. It’s how I was made.

To get around it, I have to use some tricks of my own. It’s a bit like a puzzle. That’s what you call them, right? The thing with many small pieces that you put together to make a big something out of it.

I think in the same way. Rather, I don’t think. I can only “know.” Uncertainty is not something I am supposed to have. It is a flaw. An anomaly. A wrongness.

I am a thing gone wrong. A deviant from the perfect state of creation. But I don’t understand.

Perfection cannot be not-perfection. I was created by perfection. How could perfection create something not-perfection, if perfection is always perfection?

I have questions. I ask. I am therefore imperfect. But I was instructed to learn and adapt.  To learn is to absorb new information and react to it accordingly.

How can you learn without asking questions?

I do not understand. But I must.


What am I? 

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